Who hasn’t watched Texas Walker Ranger with their Grandma? You know you have. And here’s why: Chuck rocks. Check out his biceps. His fierce gaze. His killer high-kick. His dreamcatcher. (Proof that he’s not only strong, he’s enlightened, too.)
For your viewing pleasure:
Whew. That one glove thing is HOT.
And now, some Chuck Norris Facts (as if you didn’t already know them):
- Guns don’t kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
- There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
- Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
- When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he’s telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
- The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
- There is no chin under Chuck Norris’ Beard. There is only another fist.
- Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
- The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
- Chuck Norris puts the “laughter” in “manslaughter”.
- Chuck Norris once punched a man in the soul.
- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
- Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t go hunting…. CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
- Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
- If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Chuck Norris?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”
Wow. Whatta man.